The girl that looks back at me..
Getting ready today I looked at the mirror..and for once I really looked, and I saw this strange person looking back at me.
The house that I had spent countless years getting ready in, today after coming back to that house after a whole year I stare back at the reflection of this rather strange person. Her strangeness lay in her difference.
The girl that looked back at me had a mission, a mission to be comfortable and challenged - comfortable in her body and challenged to grow into all that she is capable of becoming. She was a lot closer to who I felt I was, the girl that resided behind the layers of socializations, insecurities, politeness and I don't even know what all to be honest. She was closer to where I had always wanted to be.
She chose to not wear eyeliner today, even though years ago one of her friends had told her to never ditch the kohl in her eyes because she looked sicked without it. All those years, most of the times she had made sure to keep that in mind. But the girl in the reflection chose to ditch it, without second-guessing much she looks nice any way.
The girl that looked back was a lot more fearless (not completely for sure) than I had been over the past many years. She let a stranger chop off her long locks irrespective of how scary it was, the fear might be hard or weird to understand, but she took that leap of faith and went with it. She did what she had wanted to try but was scared and well good for her it seems like it works for her. The girl was fearless enough to take that leap of faith, to not have regrets and just go for it. It takes strength to try live that no-regrets leap of faith kind of life, I have learnt.
The girl that looked back wore a sleeveless shirt even though she knew that where she lived, people liked their girls' arms waxed. She didn't really care, she just wanted to be comfortable in her body and modify it on her will. So she wore that shirt anyway, and decided to hang out with her girlfriend anyway. She is getting closer to where I want to be.
The girl that looked back, finally found the strength, the courage to write on her blog again irrespective of whatever. After a whole year of having shattered confidence in her own writing, owning a blog and her own self. She finally decided to write again. It is an overwhelming experience, but, this girl that looked back at me in the mirror a while ago is way closer to where I always wanted to be and I am so proud and it's crazy and it's something and a lot of things. I just hope that we can have more of these moments again, where I look at her and realize how far she has come along and realize how beautiful and challenging all that struggle to get there had been. And I hope that I can give her credit for that and hope that we can keep going like this forever...
I am proud of me.
- à¤ाmini
The house that I had spent countless years getting ready in, today after coming back to that house after a whole year I stare back at the reflection of this rather strange person. Her strangeness lay in her difference.
The girl that looked back at me had a mission, a mission to be comfortable and challenged - comfortable in her body and challenged to grow into all that she is capable of becoming. She was a lot closer to who I felt I was, the girl that resided behind the layers of socializations, insecurities, politeness and I don't even know what all to be honest. She was closer to where I had always wanted to be.
She chose to not wear eyeliner today, even though years ago one of her friends had told her to never ditch the kohl in her eyes because she looked sicked without it. All those years, most of the times she had made sure to keep that in mind. But the girl in the reflection chose to ditch it, without second-guessing much she looks nice any way.
The girl that looked back was a lot more fearless (not completely for sure) than I had been over the past many years. She let a stranger chop off her long locks irrespective of how scary it was, the fear might be hard or weird to understand, but she took that leap of faith and went with it. She did what she had wanted to try but was scared and well good for her it seems like it works for her. The girl was fearless enough to take that leap of faith, to not have regrets and just go for it. It takes strength to try live that no-regrets leap of faith kind of life, I have learnt.
The girl that looked back wore a sleeveless shirt even though she knew that where she lived, people liked their girls' arms waxed. She didn't really care, she just wanted to be comfortable in her body and modify it on her will. So she wore that shirt anyway, and decided to hang out with her girlfriend anyway. She is getting closer to where I want to be.
The girl that looked back, finally found the strength, the courage to write on her blog again irrespective of whatever. After a whole year of having shattered confidence in her own writing, owning a blog and her own self. She finally decided to write again. It is an overwhelming experience, but, this girl that looked back at me in the mirror a while ago is way closer to where I always wanted to be and I am so proud and it's crazy and it's something and a lot of things. I just hope that we can have more of these moments again, where I look at her and realize how far she has come along and realize how beautiful and challenging all that struggle to get there had been. And I hope that I can give her credit for that and hope that we can keep going like this forever...
I am proud of me.
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